| funny shit | | Posted by: |
Robert Stewart was allegedly caught in the act by two terrified cleaners who walked into his bedroom in a hostel.
Stewart has denied the accusation, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.
The 51-year-old bachelor was charged with the bizarre sexual offence after he was disturbed by the cleaner and her colleague in a private hostel in Ayr.
The charge alleges he conducted himself in a disorderly manner, simulated sex with a bicycle and continued to do so while naked from the waist down in the presence of two female employees.
Stewart had been living in the Aberley House hostel from October 2006 after moving from his council house in Girvan, Ayrshire.
He moved after a separate sex complaint to which he has pleaded not guilty at Ayr Sheriff Court.
Unemployed Stewart has now left Aberley House and is living in a flat in the centre of Ayr.
Asked about the claim he was simulating sex with the bike, he said: "You'll need to ask the cleaners why they would say that, the Sunday Mail reports.
"It's a lot of rubbish, a lot of rubbish."
His solicitor Gerry Tierney said last night: "My client denies the allegations and intends to defend the charge vigorously."
A spokeswoman for the Aberley House hostel for the homeless said: "We cannot comment because of client confidentiality."
| sitemoney jake gold 904 days ago  |
| Comments: 0 Group: General | Views: 310 | |
| No subject | | Posted by: |
A Chinese woman claims her cat has grown wings.
Granny Feng's tom cat has sprouted two hairy 4ins long wings, reports the Huashang News.
"At first, they were just two bumps, but they started to grow quickly, and after a month there were two wings," she said.
Feng, of Xianyang city, Shaanxi province, says the wings, which contain bones, make her pet look like a 'cat angel'. Her explanation is that the cat sprouted the wings after being sexually harassed.
"A month ago, many female cats in heat came to harass him, and then the wings started to grow," she said.
However, experts say the phenomenon is more likely down to a gene mutation, and say it shouldn't prevent the cat living a normal life.
| sitemoney jake gold 904 days ago  |
| Comments: 0 Group: General | Views: 334 | |
| No subject | | Posted by: |
A Chinese woman claims her cat has grown wings.
Granny Feng's tom cat has sprouted two hairy 4ins long wings, reports the Huashang News.
"At first, they were just two bumps, but they started to grow quickly, and after a month there were two wings," she said.
Feng, of Xianyang city, Shaanxi province, says the wings, which contain bones, make her pet look like a 'cat angel'. Her explanation is that the cat sprouted the wings after being sexually harassed.
"A month ago, many female cats in heat came to harass him, and then the wings started to grow," she said.
However, experts say the phenomenon is more likely down to a gene mutation, and say it shouldn't prevent the cat living a normal life.
| sitemoney jake gold 904 days ago  |
| Comments: 0 Group: General | Views: 334 | |
| No subject | | Posted by: |
A South African man was stripped and superglued to his exercise bicycle and his mouth glued shut for hours by armed robbers who ransacked his home and helped themselves to his finest Scotch whisky.
The man was hijacked at gunpoint in a wealthy suburb of Johannesburg and forced to lead the thieves to his home in another area, a spokesman for the emergency services told the SAPA news agency.
He was forced to strip before being superglued to the seat of his exercise bicycle. His hands and feet were also glued and his mouth sealed shut, the spokesman said.
The robbers wore suits and reportedly helped themselves to the victim's Chivas Regal Scotch whisky while cleaning out his home.
Help arrived only three hours later, when the man's partner arrived home.
Emergency services workers used chemicals mixed with Vaseline to release him.
| sitemoney jake gold 904 days ago  |
| Comments: 0 Group: General | Views: 306 | |
| funny stories | | Posted by: |
A tour of a space facility in the US apparently prompted Prince Philip to ask how astronauts deal with "natural functions" in space. So how exactly do they go to the toilet?
It's all to do with air flow. On earth, in the West at least, your standard toilet is a water-flush affair, that takes waste and washes it down a pipe.
Space toilets use air flow as water flushes have drawbacks in zero gravity.
Adult nappies are used on space walks and during take-off and landing .
The lack of gravity on the shuttle and the space station mean a water-flush system is not an option. You don't need a particularly vivid imagination to see the potential problems.
Instead, on the shuttle, urine and faeces are carried away by rapid flow of air.
The unisex toilet resembles a conventional loo, but with straps over the feet and bars over the thighs to make sure that the astronauts don't drift off mid-go. The seat is designed so the astronaut's bottom can be perfectly flush to make a good seal.
The good news for fans of convenience is that, on the shuttle at least, urinating standing up is possible. A funnel-on-a-hose contraption is included so that astronauts - both male and female - can urinate standing up. Or sitting down if they prefer. They just attach it to the toilet using a pivoting bracket.
The system separates solid and liquid waste. Solids are compressed and remain on-board to be unloaded after landing. Liquids are released into space. Nasa hopes one day to recycle waste productively.
Researchers at the University of Guelph in Canada have said such recycling will be key to tackling any future mission to Mars in order to feed the astronauts.
The air used in the space shuttle's toilet system has to be filtered to get rid of the smell and bacteria before it is returned to the living area.
On the International Space Station, the fundamental principle is similar. The fan-powered air-flow toilet system stores waste. Urine is sucked up and stored in 20 litre containers which are dumped into the Progress resupply craft. The ship is later ejected into the atmosphere, where it burns up , BBC reports.
For solid waste, a plastic bag covered in holes is placed inside the toilet. Air is sucked through the holes so everything ends up in the bag. The elasticised top closes and the bag is pushed into a metal container. A new bag is popped in for the next visitor. Again the waste heads off to Progress.
| sitemoney jake gold 904 days ago  |
| Comments: 0 Group: General | Views: 399 | |
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| sitemoney jake gold 904 days ago  |
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